Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Wife Challenge

    Yesterday was quite the busy day... 3 children, work, a short "break" of playing with my three wonderful monkey's outside including a baseball catch with my son while making dinner, eating, then packing the kiddos in the car and heading to a leader meeting at church. I sat down on the couch for the first time around 10 o'clock. Since the birth of my third, I have chosen for life to slow down for our family, but it just happened to be one of those days. Well, as my bottom hit the couch I realized the kitchen was clean, the dishes were done, the table was wiped down, the toys were put away and even the unfolded laundry has disappeared into their respective drawers. Ahhhhhh, my husband. Yes, he is wonderful!
    This  morning I was thinking of how I can thank him and publicly praise him. I was about to put a post on Facebook and then thought, "All those poor women whose husbands don't help around the house will think evil thoughts... I better not." However, the Lord tells me to respect my husband (Eph 5:33), to love him (John 13:34), to encourage him and build him up (1 Thess 5:11), pray for him (1 Tim 2:1)... (and every other command in the Bible - not just because he is my husband, but because he is a person, a creation of God's). So, I am still going to post.
    I have decided to write this little blog to go along with it though. You see, my husband has faults too. The difference is that in our house, we forgive easily, we forgive quickly, we forgive often, and we forgive freely. There is no need to rant and rave to my girlfriends when he drives me crazy because once you forgive those emotions and feelings quickly drift and the promises made to each other stand firm.
Believe it or not, every else's husband is just like mine... they all have strengths and weakness. His strength may not be housework. It may be words or being a good provider or planning family events, etc. Actually, you may not even know what his gifts is... have you prayed the Lord reveal it to you? Have you sought out his strengths (or just focused on his weaknesses)? And then once you know it, have you encouraged him in it?
    Mark and I do our best to operate like a team. Team players cover each other... get their back. We understand we both have sin we are dealing with... weakness to overcome. We help and encourage each other through those instead of throwing stones. But when our team mate gets a good hit, we cheer cheer cheer! It's amazing what a little encouragement can do.
    When I left teaching at an amazing school in NY (at the time I taught, the district was #7 in the country) and moved to Rock Hill, SC there was a huge difference in the schools. One of the biggest differences I saw was the expectation level. In my old school the kids were expected to do amazing, go to college and become world changers. In this new school where some of my students had chickens... yes chickens... people hoped they would graduate. Why!?!?! Well, I had no intentions of changing my expectations for my students. I expected them all to become world changers as well... I knew it and they knew it. I didn't nag them to death, show my disappointment when they failed, push them to tears. Nope! I encouraged and cheered them on. If they got a D or below on a test, I made them write me a paper on the topic they failed. If that didn't bring in a higher grade then rewrote it again. We would do it until they knew the material and their grade was up. They know my motto - "I refused to let you fail!" I made as many lessons as I could as amazing as I could so they could remember, understand, reapply, and reinvent as much as they could. Do we do this for our husbands? Do we cheer them on? Do we help them when they fail? Do we never give up on them? Do we make life amazing for them?
    Mark makes it easy for me to praise him in so many areas, but I truly feel that I do my best to make it easy for him to succeed in every area of life as well. I'm bringing on a challenge for myself and all you readers out there: Find, search and discover as many strengths as possible in our husbands and let's spend this week being their biggest cheerleader!
    One more last thought - don't put your trust in your husband. You can trust him, but don't put your trust IN him. He will fail you at times, and unmet expectations can cause frustration. (Jeremiah 17:7-8) Allow God to meet all your needs and obey Him in the way your love your husband.


Pappy & Meme Healy said...

Christie this was excellent, but I want to take this a step further, Men you should be doing this for your wives also. They have been personally given to you from God so we need to hold them in the highest since we all know God doesn't make mistakes.

Aubrey Atkinson said...

Love it. I'm in. I'm still a newlywed so this shouldn't be an issue...but we are human. And adjusting to married life can allow for the nit picking of faults, etc. Thanks Christie!!

Maggie said...

Thank you for posting this. I used to feel bad praising my husband in front of other wives or husbands who maybe aren't so happy in their marriages, but I too realized that no, God wants me to! Thank you for your posts, they're a blessing. You are an amazing woman, Christie Rainwater. I miss you so much!