Monday, January 25, 2010

Is Your Trust in Something with a Bad Reputation?

Mark and I have been walking alongside several friends with struggling marriages over the past year. It has brought pain, tears, and increased faith for all, or should I say most, along this dark road. Having both been there at one point ourselves, we know this road well and where it can lead, and have learned much along our travels. One important lesson...
Don't trust your feelings over truth!

I want to first acknowledge that feelings are a part of us, created by God. There are times in life when we have a feeling or instinct that we do need to trust, but FIRST consider your heart and look for truth. God's Word in Jeremiah 17:9 says, "The heart is more deceitful than all else And is desperately sick; Who can understand it?" Is that something you want to just put full trust in when it's reputation is not the best? Here is another thought - feelings fluctuate as much as the waves of the sea and may change with the wind. If you go to a party, you are feeling happy. If at that party you find out your dog died, you suddenly feel sad. Feeling will come and go, but you need something to steady you through them - TRUTH, your compass.

When you have a feeling, before you run with it, check it against God's Word - the standard for truth. It offers peace despite a circumstance or feeling. This is true of any circumstance you are facing, but allow me a moment to apply it to these marriages. For those who are struggling with a feeling (anger, lust for another that is not your spouse, hurt, pain, etc.) that may draw you away from your spouse, do not trust that feeling! Trust the Truth! The truth is that you committed to that spouse for better or worse. Invest in them! Love them unconditionally! That feeling may soon change. Feelings follow our choices, not the other way around. Choose first - don't allow your feelings to choose for you. If you are at a point where your feelings are all over the place and you don't know what to do, pray and seek counsel from trusted friends. They may tell you something that you don't want to hear (because you don't feel like it), but go with it and your feelings will follow.

God's Word promises in Romans 8:28 to work all things out for good if you love God - trust that promise...
and    h o l d    o n    f o r    t h e    r i d e.

Some other scriptures to think on:

  • No, the word is very near you; it is in your mouth and in your heart so that you may obey it. (De 30:14)

  • Accept instruction from his mouth and lay up his words in your heart. (Job 22:22)

  • May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer. (Ps 19:14)

  • The discerning heart seeks knowledge, but the mouth of a fool feeds on folly. (Pr 15:14)

  • But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and these make a man `unclean'. (Mt 15:18)

  • "What comes out of a man is what makes him `unclean'. For from within, out of men's hearts, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed, malice, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, arrogance and folly. All these evils come from inside and make a man `unclean'." (MA 7:20-23)

  • The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks. (Lu 6:45)

  • As water reflects a face, so a man's heart reflects the man. (Pr 27:19)

  • Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life. (Pr 4:23)


Thelma said...


erin said...

Great Post Christie! Mike and I are teaching an engaged couples class at church right now. Last night we spoke on Family Ties and forgiving those who have hurt you in your past so you can be whole and give your entire self to your spouse the way God intended you to. At the end, we talked about, "What if I don't feel like forgiving?" We used the visual of train. You have to choose forgiveness. Once you choose forgiveness your will is aligning with God's will and then the feelings will come. The trains were labeled Forgiveness-Will-Feelings. Your post reminded me so much of that visual. A lot of times we don't feel like doing something but we have to make a conscious choice based on the truth of God's word. Then the feelings will come! Thanks for sharing your heart!! It is great to read other women's Godly wisdom!!

Christie said...

Erin - I love that object lesson of the train! I will have to remember that one!! :-)